Anita: Are you related to the Bowden family in Davie County,NC? I used to know someone in this family. They are European-American. Jane.
-----Original Message-----
>From: Anita Wills <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Jun 17, 2007 7:06 PM
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: [VA-HIST] Loving the slaves
>
>Melinda,
>Nova Scotia is on my most see list. A group of my Bowden ancestors, settled
>there around 1834 after leaving Virginia. I was in touch with some of the
>descendants, but have not heard from them in years.
>
>Thank you for your insightful post.
>
>Anita
>
>
>>From: Melinda Skinner <[log in to unmask]>
>>Reply-To: Discussion of research and writing about Virginia history
>> <[log in to unmask]>
>>To: [log in to unmask]
>>Subject: Re: Loving the slaves
>>Date: Sun, 17 Jun 2007 19:44:53 +0000
>>
>>Loretta,
>>You are right. It is intriguing to read all the messages on this subject
>>and fascinatingly revealing.
>>The problem is, there were too many cruel, even sadistic, slave holders;
>>and they-- when the horrible facts become known-- are held up as the evil
>>people they were. Many who owned slaves worked as hard as those they
>>"owned" and treated them well. Also, for some of those first-generation
>>Africans who were brought to America
>>the situation they found themselves in as slaves to a reasonable (and
>>sometimes kind) master may have been an improvement over what they had been
>>through since their initial capture and resulting transport. It is all so
>>relative to individuals, and we cannot assume every European was satanic or
>>that every African slave was mistreated. That being said, there is no
>>question that slavery in any form by any people is wrong, cruel and-- even
>>taking the "times" into consideration-- many slave holders knew that in
>>their hearts. They were too desperate for labor and/or too cowardly to
>>buck the established social set-up. It is as wrong for people to say that
>>slavery was not so bad as it is to say that every slave was badly treated.
>>There is evidence for both sides of the story; and, if you only take one
>>side, that is not honest history.
>>My 2 cents, as I travel to Nova Scotia (and found a handy wi-fi).
>>--
>>Melinda C. P. Skinner
>>Richmond, VA
>>
>>
>> -------------- Original message ----------------------
>>From: Loretta Kelldorf <[log in to unmask]>
>> > List Readers:
>> >
>> > I find it very interesting that people today are having difficulty
>>believing
>> > that it was possible for some slave owners to love their slaves as
>>fellow human
>> > beings! They weren't pets. The love I have read about was nothing like
>>loving
>> > one's pet. The capacity to love is very different in every individual.
>>Some
>> > people have a much greater capacity for loving than do others. When
>>you read
>> > about mean slave owners mistreating their slaves, you have no context
>>for that
>> > slave-owner's relationship to other people...black or white. You might
>>consider
>> > that. The man that is mean is likely to be mean to everyone. He/she
>>may
>> > practice it a little differently depending on how they view the
>>intelligence and
>> > reprisal capacity of the other person; but, they will spread their
>>meanness
>> > around to everyone in one way or another. Kind people spread their
>>kindness
>> > the same way.
>> >
>> > Life was hard; it was rugged in earlier times. Many people hardened
>>their
>> > feelings and sensitivities in order to make life bearable because they
>> > anticipated many losses and hurts in a lifetime. Whatever level of
>> > insensitivity they cultivated, it touched all of their relationships,
>>not just
>> > the relationships with their slaves.
>> >
>> > I have in my file the will of a lady in Sumner Co. TN who stated in the
>>will
>> > that she was old; her sons were grown and already gifted with land when
>>they
>> > married. Therefore she was willing that her total considerable assets,
>>both
>> > real and personal, be sold and the money used to relocate all her black
>>family
>> > to Illinois or Ohio where they could be free. The money was to be used
>>to buy
>> > them land and farm animals to furnish them a home and a means of
>>livelihood.
>> >
>> > When I visited (within the past six years) the family home of this
>>lady, which
>> > was built in 1808, and talked to the present owner, he told me of
>>several
>> > carloads of black people who arrived one day the summer before my visit.
>> He
>> > said they told him they had come to visit and pay respects to the estate
>>of the
>> > lady who had been responsible for re-locating their families to free
>>states and
>> > gifting them with land and a means of establishing and maintaining
>>themselves.
>> > Respect, love and appreciation was part of the heritage of these black
>>people
>> > who continued to think of the white family as their kinsmen.
>> >
>> > Kinsmen. While many of you are reading wills of demeaning
>>relationships, I
>> > have found numerous wills where the deceased has called his slaves his
>>"black
>> > family". That is evidence of a kind relationship to one's fellow man.
>> >
>> > There is another story in TN, of a soldier kin to the lady who left her
>>estate
>> > to re-locate the black families, that went to fight in the Civil War as
>>a
>> > Confederate. Every day that he was gone, his black "Mammy" sat on the
>>front
>> > porch watching for him to return. She kept the vigil every day until he
>>finally
>> > did return. She died soon after he came home. This is genuine love of
>>one
>> > human for another human, not as pets, but as equal and worthy human
>>beings.
>> >
>> > There is in the Bedford County TN Heritage History book published within
>>the
>> > last five years a story of a black man who followed his white slave
>>owner into
>> > war. The soldier was a Confederate. When he was wounded his black
>>servant cared
>> > for him until he could travel and took him home to recuperate. The
>>black
>> > servant then went to fight in the Civil War for the Union! Fought with
>>the Union
>> > Army for two years. When the war was over, the black soldier then had a
>> > pension. The white family for whom he had been a slave was left
>>landless and
>> > penniless by the war. The BLACK MAN TOOK THE WHITE FAMILY IN AND CARED
>>FOR THEM
>> > AND PROVIDED FOR THEM. Love is in the heart; not in the law.
>>Sensitivity is a
>> > form of love.
>> >
>> > In my own family, my great grandmother's brother and his wife in TN
>>had in
>> > their probate files lists of the expenses encountered during their
>>illness. We
>> > are talking now about 1880. When I read the lists of expenses hoping to
>>get a
>> > clue to their last illness I was impressed by how many entries there
>>were for
>> > items for "the black family". While no specific names were given, how
>>much
>> > better name can you have than to be called FAMILY? There were no other
>>names in
>> > the list, white or black. The mention of the black family was to
>>differentiate
>> > the expenses from their own personal expenses for whatever reason they
>>may have
>> > needed to do that. I was touched that they gave equal concern and equal
>> > provision to their black family.
>> >
>> > To be sure, the world is full of meanness. But it is also full of
>>kindness.
>> > Where do you intend to put your focus? If you want to change the way
>>the world
>> > thinks, then inspect your own thinking. So many of you are full of anger
>>over
>> > things past; you cannot do anything today to change what was. Your
>>inspection
>> > of meanness and speculation about how people may have felt a hundred or
>>two
>> > hundred years ago is neither productive nor constructive. It is a
>>given that
>> > Slavery is wrong in any time and in any place. No thinking and feeling
>>person
>> > argues the rightness of slavery in this enlightened time in which we
>>live today.
>> > What people thought then is gone. You need to deal with today. Focus
>>on
>> > positive education, positive instruction, positive goals. That is what
>>changes
>> > things in positive ways. Of course black people have struggled. Many
>> > minorities of all colors have struggled. Pioneers struggled. Struggle
>>is a
>> > part of existence. History is important and getting history correct is
>> > important. But, be careful where you place your emphasis. Who is to
>>say you
>> > have the right call on what is exactly right in history or the exactly
>>right way
>> > to record it? You are a filter the same as any other person. Check
>>your
>> > filters. Concern yourselves with those things about which you can do
>>something
>> > constructive. Intellectual conversation can be constructive but it
>>shouldn't
>> > beat the same dead horse to death again and again. What are you trying
>>to prove?
>> > Some discussions can be concluded.
>> >
>> > Frankly, I am very tired of reading about your soapbox on slavery. It is
>>not the
>> > only wrong thing that took place in history! Thinking of the
>>affection of one
>> > white human being for a black human being as being comparable to the
>>way we
>> > feel about our pets is the last offense for me. You are trying to
>> > intellectualize emotions in the most cruelly unemotional way. Where is
>>your
>> > personal sensitivity? Let the real psychologist ponder the emotions of
>>affection
>> > between people. Are there no other subjects to intellectually inspect
>>and
>> > enlarge upon than slavery?
>> >
>> > Loretta Kelldorf
>> > NOT a Historian but a fair genealogist
>> > Education : Speech and Hearing Pathology
>> > Psychology
>> > Special Education w/ emotionally disturbed, mentally
>>retarded,
>> > language-learning
>> > disabled.
>> > Lifetime pet owner of many wonderful companions.
>
>_________________________________________________________________
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Lillian Jane Steele
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