Anita: Are you related to the Bowden family in Davie County,NC? I used to know someone in this family. They are European-American. Jane. -----Original Message----- >From: Anita Wills <[log in to unmask]> >Sent: Jun 17, 2007 7:06 PM >To: [log in to unmask] >Subject: Re: [VA-HIST] Loving the slaves > >Melinda, >Nova Scotia is on my most see list. A group of my Bowden ancestors, settled >there around 1834 after leaving Virginia. I was in touch with some of the >descendants, but have not heard from them in years. > >Thank you for your insightful post. > >Anita > > >>From: Melinda Skinner <[log in to unmask]> >>Reply-To: Discussion of research and writing about Virginia history >> <[log in to unmask]> >>To: [log in to unmask] >>Subject: Re: Loving the slaves >>Date: Sun, 17 Jun 2007 19:44:53 +0000 >> >>Loretta, >>You are right. It is intriguing to read all the messages on this subject >>and fascinatingly revealing. >>The problem is, there were too many cruel, even sadistic, slave holders; >>and they-- when the horrible facts become known-- are held up as the evil >>people they were. Many who owned slaves worked as hard as those they >>"owned" and treated them well. Also, for some of those first-generation >>Africans who were brought to America >>the situation they found themselves in as slaves to a reasonable (and >>sometimes kind) master may have been an improvement over what they had been >>through since their initial capture and resulting transport. It is all so >>relative to individuals, and we cannot assume every European was satanic or >>that every African slave was mistreated. That being said, there is no >>question that slavery in any form by any people is wrong, cruel and-- even >>taking the "times" into consideration-- many slave holders knew that in >>their hearts. They were too desperate for labor and/or too cowardly to >>buck the established social set-up. It is as wrong for people to say that >>slavery was not so bad as it is to say that every slave was badly treated. >>There is evidence for both sides of the story; and, if you only take one >>side, that is not honest history. >>My 2 cents, as I travel to Nova Scotia (and found a handy wi-fi). >>-- >>Melinda C. P. Skinner >>Richmond, VA >> >> >> -------------- Original message ---------------------- >>From: Loretta Kelldorf <[log in to unmask]> >> > List Readers: >> > >> > I find it very interesting that people today are having difficulty >>believing >> > that it was possible for some slave owners to love their slaves as >>fellow human >> > beings! They weren't pets. The love I have read about was nothing like >>loving >> > one's pet. The capacity to love is very different in every individual. >>Some >> > people have a much greater capacity for loving than do others. When >>you read >> > about mean slave owners mistreating their slaves, you have no context >>for that >> > slave-owner's relationship to other people...black or white. You might >>consider >> > that. The man that is mean is likely to be mean to everyone. He/she >>may >> > practice it a little differently depending on how they view the >>intelligence and >> > reprisal capacity of the other person; but, they will spread their >>meanness >> > around to everyone in one way or another. Kind people spread their >>kindness >> > the same way. >> > >> > Life was hard; it was rugged in earlier times. Many people hardened >>their >> > feelings and sensitivities in order to make life bearable because they >> > anticipated many losses and hurts in a lifetime. Whatever level of >> > insensitivity they cultivated, it touched all of their relationships, >>not just >> > the relationships with their slaves. >> > >> > I have in my file the will of a lady in Sumner Co. TN who stated in the >>will >> > that she was old; her sons were grown and already gifted with land when >>they >> > married. Therefore she was willing that her total considerable assets, >>both >> > real and personal, be sold and the money used to relocate all her black >>family >> > to Illinois or Ohio where they could be free. The money was to be used >>to buy >> > them land and farm animals to furnish them a home and a means of >>livelihood. >> > >> > When I visited (within the past six years) the family home of this >>lady, which >> > was built in 1808, and talked to the present owner, he told me of >>several >> > carloads of black people who arrived one day the summer before my visit. >> He >> > said they told him they had come to visit and pay respects to the estate >>of the >> > lady who had been responsible for re-locating their families to free >>states and >> > gifting them with land and a means of establishing and maintaining >>themselves. >> > Respect, love and appreciation was part of the heritage of these black >>people >> > who continued to think of the white family as their kinsmen. >> > >> > Kinsmen. While many of you are reading wills of demeaning >>relationships, I >> > have found numerous wills where the deceased has called his slaves his >>"black >> > family". That is evidence of a kind relationship to one's fellow man. >> > >> > There is another story in TN, of a soldier kin to the lady who left her >>estate >> > to re-locate the black families, that went to fight in the Civil War as >>a >> > Confederate. Every day that he was gone, his black "Mammy" sat on the >>front >> > porch watching for him to return. She kept the vigil every day until he >>finally >> > did return. She died soon after he came home. This is genuine love of >>one >> > human for another human, not as pets, but as equal and worthy human >>beings. >> > >> > There is in the Bedford County TN Heritage History book published within >>the >> > last five years a story of a black man who followed his white slave >>owner into >> > war. The soldier was a Confederate. When he was wounded his black >>servant cared >> > for him until he could travel and took him home to recuperate. The >>black >> > servant then went to fight in the Civil War for the Union! Fought with >>the Union >> > Army for two years. When the war was over, the black soldier then had a >> > pension. The white family for whom he had been a slave was left >>landless and >> > penniless by the war. The BLACK MAN TOOK THE WHITE FAMILY IN AND CARED >>FOR THEM >> > AND PROVIDED FOR THEM. Love is in the heart; not in the law. >>Sensitivity is a >> > form of love. >> > >> > In my own family, my great grandmother's brother and his wife in TN >>had in >> > their probate files lists of the expenses encountered during their >>illness. We >> > are talking now about 1880. When I read the lists of expenses hoping to >>get a >> > clue to their last illness I was impressed by how many entries there >>were for >> > items for "the black family". While no specific names were given, how >>much >> > better name can you have than to be called FAMILY? There were no other >>names in >> > the list, white or black. The mention of the black family was to >>differentiate >> > the expenses from their own personal expenses for whatever reason they >>may have >> > needed to do that. I was touched that they gave equal concern and equal >> > provision to their black family. >> > >> > To be sure, the world is full of meanness. But it is also full of >>kindness. >> > Where do you intend to put your focus? If you want to change the way >>the world >> > thinks, then inspect your own thinking. So many of you are full of anger >>over >> > things past; you cannot do anything today to change what was. Your >>inspection >> > of meanness and speculation about how people may have felt a hundred or >>two >> > hundred years ago is neither productive nor constructive. It is a >>given that >> > Slavery is wrong in any time and in any place. No thinking and feeling >>person >> > argues the rightness of slavery in this enlightened time in which we >>live today. >> > What people thought then is gone. You need to deal with today. Focus >>on >> > positive education, positive instruction, positive goals. That is what >>changes >> > things in positive ways. Of course black people have struggled. Many >> > minorities of all colors have struggled. Pioneers struggled. Struggle >>is a >> > part of existence. History is important and getting history correct is >> > important. But, be careful where you place your emphasis. Who is to >>say you >> > have the right call on what is exactly right in history or the exactly >>right way >> > to record it? You are a filter the same as any other person. Check >>your >> > filters. Concern yourselves with those things about which you can do >>something >> > constructive. Intellectual conversation can be constructive but it >>shouldn't >> > beat the same dead horse to death again and again. What are you trying >>to prove? >> > Some discussions can be concluded. >> > >> > Frankly, I am very tired of reading about your soapbox on slavery. It is >>not the >> > only wrong thing that took place in history! Thinking of the >>affection of one >> > white human being for a black human being as being comparable to the >>way we >> > feel about our pets is the last offense for me. You are trying to >> > intellectualize emotions in the most cruelly unemotional way. Where is >>your >> > personal sensitivity? Let the real psychologist ponder the emotions of >>affection >> > between people. Are there no other subjects to intellectually inspect >>and >> > enlarge upon than slavery? >> > >> > Loretta Kelldorf >> > NOT a Historian but a fair genealogist >> > Education : Speech and Hearing Pathology >> > Psychology >> > Special Education w/ emotionally disturbed, mentally >>retarded, >> > language-learning >> > disabled. >> > Lifetime pet owner of many wonderful companions. > >_________________________________________________________________ >Make every IM count. Download Messenger and join the im Initiative now. >Its free. http://im.live.com/messenger/im/home/?source=TAGHM_June07 Lillian Jane Steele